One more move

Wednesday is going to feel like deja vu.  We have to pack up a U-Haul trailer and move the next day.  Feel like you've read this before?  I know it feels like I have typed this before.  We have been staying with my uncle until the first of September when we can finally move into our apartment. 

The two weeks we have been spending here have flown by and just when we get use to everything it's time to move.  The nice thing is that it is going to be a bit more permanent than the first move.  We signed our lease last week and got to do a walk through of a similar size apartment in comparison to the one we will be living in.  Going from a two bedroom, two bathroom apartment with a washer and a dryer to a one bed/one bath no washer or dryer is going to definitely be a change.  Not only are there less things like that, it is also about three hundred square feet smaller, but there are some benefits.  Like having a storage garage for all the tubs of shit holiday decorations we have.  There is also a nice big walk in pantry to make up for the lack of cupboards in the kitchen.    The biggest benefit though?  The amount of money we will save on rent.  The endgame is a house (whether it is renting or buying) in the near future. 

While apartments are nice because they require little upkeep, a house is a house.  It's the adult thing to do.  Once you get to a certain age, I think that it sounds a little funny to say that you live in an apartment.  As you start to get older and get more established the next step in life has always seemed to be house ownership.  And you can go from there and expand your family if you want via a pet or via the human pet (also known as a kid). 

I wrote about wanting a house earlier this year and I still want to live in one.  In the two weeks we have staying with my uncle, it has been nice to live somewhere that has stairs in it not going up to it.  It breaks everything up and separates everything.  Which is kind of why people who live in houses acquire more shit.  It all gets spread out and it looks like you have less than what you have.  Oh well. 





Wednesday.  The last part of our escape from the flat state of Kansas. 

Religious humor

I don't know what made me think of this today, but it popped into my head and made me chuckle.  Everyone remembers a few months ago when the rapture was suppose to happen, right?  Remember how pretty much everyone was going to be stuck here and not taken into heaven because of the horrible lives we have led?  Okay, now that you are all with me, enjoy this.

In the last week or so in Kansas, I noticed more and more of the 'In god we trust' license plates.  Which is fine.  If that's your thing, that's your thing.  Just don't push it on anyone else.  That's not the humorous part.  Around the license plate, the license plate holder thingy that people buy that usually has a sports team or an annoying phrase like 'princess' or 'you wouldn't understand, it's a rich person thing', there was the phrase 'in the event of rapture, vehicle will be unoccupied'. 

Knowing where I was at, I knew that this person had to have bought it half as a joke and more than likely half being serious. 





And I don't know which is scarier. 

Love and hate for Kansas (part two)

After writing why I enjoyed moving away from Kansas a few days ago, I figured I would follow it up with why I enjoyed living there. 

A stepping stone.  It was a good place to start our professional lives.  Out of college, we agreed to move to the first place that gave either of us a decent paying job.  As it turns out, it was Wichita, Kansas.  The major downside from the get go was the distance from home.  The furthest we had lived from home was in college and it was only a three hour drive.  To go from that to practically four states away was rough to start with, but it was part of growing up.  Wichita is big enough to get a big city feel, but still small enough where you didn't have to worry about a ton of traffic or too much urban sprawl.

Broader horizons.  We saw part of the country that we would not have ever seen.  And who would blame us?  Who wants to go on a vacation to see Kansas or Missouri when you have no family or friends to visit?  Because we lived down there, we visited Colorado to see my brother-in-law, took several trips to southwestern Missouri for float trips, hell Andrea went down to Oklahoma to go wedding dress shopping.  We got to see Texas first hand when we went down there for a birthday weekend to see the Red Wings play the Stars.  Nebraska was a stopping point for a weekend five years ago when I was playing vintage base ball (yes, it's two words when you play old school style).  So the southern mid-west was explored and would have remained just some crazy right wing states that we never went to if we never lived in Kansas.  Were they the greatest trips and vacations?  Not really.  They were mostly for a weekend and there was purpose to them, it was not to just go and relax.  But we got to do these trips with friends and that is what counts.

Our friends.  Wherever you go, you are always going to make friends.  When you leave, you must obviously leave these friends behind.  Sometimes, these friends keep in contact for a few years only to start drifting away to the recesses of your memories and stories.  Other times, they stick with you for the rest of your life.  I hope that our friends stick with us.  I know that it is a two way street with keeping in contact, and it is hard sometimes to really go that extra mile which is why things like Facebook, Twitter, and blogs are so helpful these days.  If we need a reason to go back to Kansas, that would be the only one, friends.  There is no point in visiting if you can't see the people that made the state worthwhile.  The nice thing about moving up to Minnesota, is that we already have some friends from high school that are here.  It's good to have that little base just in case it takes a while to settle in at work and find people that are worth hanging out with (that sounds snooty and pretentious but I'm sticking with it).  

 You know, I tried to balance the love and the hate out by coming up with equal numbers, but I can only think of three reasons why I enjoyed our time in Kansas.  I came up with four hates, although two of the four kind of go hand in hand.  But, such is life. 





And besides, I don't live there anymore so I don't have to worry about it. 

A nice note before it gets messy

Dear Hipsters:

Give us real men back our beards.  Stick to your skinny jeans that will hopefully cut off circulation to your genitals to help prevent your breeding aspirations and keep your thick rimmed glasses and give us back the most masculine thing a man can do.  If you do not, I will start to hunt you all down with trimmers and a rusty disposable razor.  

Sincerely,



M. Litzner
Future Hipster Hunter and Shaver



P.S.  Give us back our Chucks, you don't deserve them. 

Love and hate for Kansas (part one)

We have officially left the state of Kansas and moved to Minnesota.  We are currently in between apartments while we wait for our new living quarters to open up.  My uncle was nice enough to put us up for a couple of weeks because we could not get a lease until 1 September.  In the mean time, we live in limbo with no address.  I told Andrea that this is our one chance to get off the grid and live a life away from the government.  She didn't go for it.

While we took the ten hours to drive up here, there was some time to look back at the six years that we lived in Kansas.  As always, there are pluses and minuses to anywhere you live.  There are a few places in this world where you can honestly say 'this is the perfect place to live for the rest of my life.'  Kansas was not one of those places for us.  However, there were some nice things about living there (look for that post in the near future).

Because I would like to end these entries on a positive note, lets take a look at some of the negative things about living in the Sunflower State. 

The hardest thing about living there was being so far away from family.  In college, we were just a three hour car ride from home.  A weekend trip was something that could be done very easily.  We left after class was done on Friday and had three full days at home.  Being in Kansas, we could only go home for vacations.  Having to work, we only made it home twice a year.  Maybe.  Our parents came down to see us a few times a year, so we got to see them and they got to see a state that they would have otherwise may not have ever seen.

The weather.  This summer has been extremely hot.  Hotter than usual.  About a month and a half (possibly more) of days over the one hundred degree mark.  That's too much, but we have grown accustom to having a few weeks of that kind of temperature, but a total of six weeks?  Way too much.  And then there is the winter, or lack thereof.  Growing up in the U.P., we are use to see two to three to four feet of snow in December and into January.  Kansas doesn't have that.  If there was two inches of snow on the ground at one time, it would be a good week.

And let's talk about the government.  When the governor states that he would sign any law that came across his desk that was anti-abortion, without even reading everything that was involved, you know there is something wrong.  The law could say that for every abortion that is stopped, a puppy gets punched in the face and he would pass it.  You can be pro-choice or pro-life, I don't care, but the minute you put out a blanket statement like that, there is something wrong with you.  It is all about pushing his agenda and not what is best for the people in the state.  This is also the governor who went down to Texas for Rick Perry's day of prayer.  Nothing like separating church and state...

Speaking of church, the religious nut jobs that are in Kansas pushed me further and further away from the First Estate.  I found some great people and friends that are quiet religious and they were not beating people over the heads with their bibles and religious beliefs and those are the kinds of religious people that I enjoy.  People I can have a discussion with.  However, those people are few and far between.  The state is populated with religious extremists.  I'm not talking about Islamic extremists that Fox News is trying to scare you with, I'm talking about the Christian extremists.  They are out there.  Case in point:  Westboro Baptist Church.  There is nothing good about them.  They are the worst people in the world.  Not all the religious people in Kansas are as bad as the WBC, but oh do they love to judge those of us who do not share their same views.  I know that any state you go to is going to have these people, but in Kansas, they just seemed to be concentrated. 

A do nothing weekend?

I have the weekend off.  I don't want to do anything.  I have a ton of stuff to get done around the apartment.  See my dilemma?  I need to find an apt time to get things done around here.

I do not want to do anything in the morning.  I want to sleep in a little bit, make a pot of coffee, and just relax.  Maybe watch a movie.  I do not want to do anything in the evening.  The Tigers are playing the Royals this weekend, and they are on TV.  So my evenings are booked solid for at least three hours starting around six thirty watching the game and getting a little drunk.  By the time the game is over, it's ten o'clock or right around there and it's close to bed time. 

That just leaves the afternoon.  The hottest part of the day and there are things that I need to do outside as well as inside. 

Some of the things that are on my list this weekend:

• Dishes
• Laundry
• Recycling
• Donations to Good Will

 I lead a rough life.  I really do. 

Shame, shame, Notre Dame

Notre Dame reinstated wide receiver Michael Floyd after suspending him during the off season for being arrested for drunk driving.  Read that again.  He was suspended by the university during the time of year when he was not playing the game he is going to school for.  Anyone else see a problem with this?

If it were a first offense, I would still have a problem with this.  HOWEVER!  This is his third alcohol related offense, and he is only twenty one.  What does that tell you?  Here comes the rant kids, hold tight...

I know that Notre Dame is all about their football program and I know it has not been relevant since the 1980s, but are you fucking kidding me?!  This isn't the kid getting caught cheating on a test, or missing a curfew, or selling memorabilia.  This is against the law, not the first time happening, public endangerment drunk driving.  It wasn't that he had just a few beers and made a horrible decision, he was twice the legal limit when given a breath test and made a horrible decision.

Ohio State football players got kicked off the team for getting free ink in exchange for game worn jerseys and this guy is reinstated after not missing any games?!  Don't just kick this kid off the team, blacklist from the sport.  Take away the one thing that you know he wants and send him off to jail.  No more chances, no more meetings, no more fines, no more college.  Jail.  Just jail.  He has had three chances.  Get him off the street and out of the parties and into that cell.  

See, this is why if I ever have kids, I will steer them away from having an athlete as a role model.  They see them getting away with this and they could think 'that it's okay'.  Obviously not every athlete is getting pulled over for drunk driving or getting busted for drugs or hookers or illegal gambling (*cough cough Alex Rodriguez cough cough*), but it is scary to think of how many kids talk about professional athletes being role models.  Why not look to family members, teachers, coaches, or religious leaders for role models or mentors?  Is it because they aren't making millions of dollars playing a game?  Just a game?  That shit ain't right.  

I honestly hope that the NCAA takes a strong hard look at this and not only gets this guy out of the sport but goes after Notre Dame for thinking that this is okay to happen with no consequences.