keep your religion off your bumper and mine

I'm just going to throw this out there and get it out of the way...religion is pissing me off. I'm sick of those fucking jesus fish on the backs of cars, and sick of the darwin fish, or the jesus fish eating the darwin fish, or the darwin fish eating the jesus fish, or the darwin fish eating the jesus fish that is eating...get my point? SICK OF IT I highly doubt that the person behind you cares if you believe in evolution or creation. They only care that you get off the phone. It's not going to change someone's mind. 'Hang on, maybe evolution did happen because that person has a fish that has legs on their bumper.' I surely hope that is not the thought process as people put that shit on their bumpers.

I do have a little wiggle room to talk about this. I openly admit, I do have three stickers on the back of The Jeep. And all have a good reason.

sticker 1: 'Marxists get crazy laid' Obviously I have a man crush on Karl Marx, its the wicked beard. I have his most popular book, I titled this whole reading and typing experiment after said book, and I own a sticker with an entire political theory based on him on my vehicle. Plus, it makes people read it a couple of times and still won't get it. He developed the greatest government (in theory) in communism: you really can't predict the greed of an entire nation...or can you?, and his development of communism led to several key events in our history in the United States, just within the last fifty years:

• The Korean War
• The Vietnam War
• The Cold War
• Our landing on the moon (we were trying to beat the Soviets there, for what I do not really know. Maybe moon rocks)
  
• Cuban missle crisis
• Fidel Castro
• Our supplying upstart Al Queda against the Soviets in Afghanistan (didn't see that end game, did we? Oops)
  

The list goes on. Think of everything that may not have happened if Karl Marx had never been born.


sticker 2: 'Don't tread on me' A wonderful statement to come out of the American Revolution. This can be applied to our current state of affairs. I try to avoid politics and the war, but this is a great thought for anyone trying to persuade someone towards the left or right.

sticker 3: 'Unamerican' Don't get me wrong, I enjoy living in this country. However, there is that great running joke revolving around that if you go outside of the North American continent, just claim to be Canadian, and I feel like doing that ALL THE TIME. People blame george bush for our current state of affairs, and rightly so, but don't forget about the rest of the politicans who either back him or didn't fight hard enough to get their agendas pushed through. In all honesty, I have lost faith in the american way. It is too commerical, for lack of a better word. It revolves heavily on what you own (for example, do soccer moms really need that H2 or yukon?) and unfortunately that is what people notice.

It'll be twenty years down the road before china takes over as 'world power', but let them have it now and let's go back to an isolationist practice until Germany tries to take over the world again.


One last thing. If it were not against some law (which I'm sure it is one), I would rip off every single bumper sticker that dealt with the 'one man + one woman = marriage' every single mother fucker that has that on their car needs to get beat. Marriage is for everyone.